


You're on my mind

by Valkiriana



Category: ONEUS (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Dorks in Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Mentions of alcohol, Misunderstandings, Recreational Drug Use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-20
Updated: 2019-10-20
Packaged: 2020-12-24 17:44:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,050
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21103454
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Valkiriana/pseuds/Valkiriana
Summary: Hwanwoong's high and in love. Can you blame him?





	You're on my mind

**Author's Note:**

> Hwanwoong's dense (and a panicked gay) and Youngjo is beautiful. That's it. That's the fic.  
Title from Tom Misch's You're on my mind because it's a beautiful song and I could see this Hwanwoong heavily relating to it. Go check it out!  
(There's alcohol and weed involved. But you stay safe kids!)

The first time Hwanwoong gets high, it's well after 2 AM, his hand into Youngjo's warm one as he‘s lead across campus, laughing obnoxiously freely, a little fuzzy, a little dizzy, and very much in love. 

There are people around him, people he doesn't know. Normally, Hwanwoong wouldn't be so reckless, wouldn't put himself in such a vulnerable state surrounded by strangers. But Youngjo had called and had so sweetly asked, practically begged Hwanwoong to join him for one night of pure freedom. And honestly, who could ever deny Youngjo of all people? Certainly not Hwanwoong. 

Exams? Exams be damned. 

Everything feels light and tingly, and a little funny as well, as if barely there. The world feels unreal, unreachable. It‘s as though there was a thin plastic film between his skin and Youngjo‘s and Hwanwoong doesn't like it. He doesn't like it one bit. So he plasters himself to the other's firm side with the chilly night as an excuse, and doesn't even try to contain his sigh when Youngjo tucks him in with an arm across his shoulders, an easy smile ready on his lips. As always. 

"You good there?" The older asks, for only him to hear above the boisterous laughs of the people around them. 

Hwanwoong looks up at him like he’s looking at the stars themselves and gives Youngjo a dumb little nod. He earns a pretty smile and a head rub that he can feel the whole way back to his dorm. 

It‘s in times like these where Hwanwoong doesn't know where they stand anymore. When Youngjo‘s so very tender with him, looks at him with such earnest eyes, Hwanwoong can't help but doubt, and dares to hope that he might -perhaps- love him too...albeit a little bit. 

Youngjo is easy, always so easy. Being around him feels as natural as breathing. It's been like this since the very first time they met, and it hasn't changed ever since . It didn't when Hwanwoong's breath started hitching at the sight of him, or when he started yearning for a little bit of love back, and it certainly won't change soon. 

But the pining just keeps getting worse with each passing day, and Hwanwoong worries that perhaps one day, when it grows too big for his heart to handle, he won't be able to stand it anymore.  
..

Youngjo accompanies him inside his building, because he’s always been overprotective like that- and perhaps he feels a bit guilty, too, to keep corrupting his little Hwanwoong like this. That, Hwanwoong cannot know. But he hopes. 

He pretends not to find his key just so that Youngjo will stay the slightest bit longer, just a bit. Should he feel bad about it? He doesn’t. He likes him so much it’s becoming nearly painful. 

Hwanwoong tried confessing once, one night he was drunk out of his mind over the phone, because, that seemed like a fucking great idea at the time. But of course, in the mess of tears, slurred words of love, and mumbled apologies, Youngjo had just chuckled and said, amused, "I love you too, where are you even?" After some reassurances and a gentle reminder to drink some water, he'd hung up. Or perhaps, Hwanwoong just fell asleep. He isn't sure. A complete and utter failure, if he says so himself. He wasn’t able to look at the older for a really long time afterwards. 

He “finally” finds his keys, and Youngjo clicks his tongue at him, teases him softly about being a mess and Hwanwoong really can’t fight back, disarmed as he feels. 

“Please.” It escapes his lips, despite himself. His hand reaches for the older’s arm, as he’s about to turn away and leave. “Stay.” Hwanwoong whispers, feeling small and vulnerable like this, as though he was baring himself for the very first time for someone else. 

“I have class tomorrow.” Youngjo chuckles, seems to glow with the tenderness of someone who has to reject the requests of a child. As if it pained him. “But I’ll see you for lunch?” He offers instead, uncurling the younger’s fingers from his arm and holding his hand in its place. He does it so often, it shouldn’t even affect Hwanwoong anymore. 

He should let Youngjo leave. He should be a good friend and put him first, shouldn’t be so very selfish. 

And yet, he longs to have him close, feels weird without his warmth next to him now that he’s high and disoriented. He needs him, wants him more than anything. And he thinks, as Youngjo eyes him curiously that, perhaps, this is- most definitely- what being in love feels like.

“Okay. I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah? Go eat someth-”

“I like you.” Hwanwoong blurts, heart pounding, his whole body feeling as though he might melt into the floor. He’d deserve it, he thinks, for being so greedy and self centered, for wanting more of whatever perfect thing Youngjo and him have going. How dare he try to ruin it- again!  
“I- god, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it, forget I ever said-”

“You didn’t mean it?” Youngjo interrupts, eyes unreadable, and it only makes Hwanwoong more nervous. Is he shaking? He might be shaking.

“I-”

“Because you’re driving me kind of crazy here, you know?” Youngjo sighs, scratching the back of his head and- oh. Oh no. No, he doesn’t want him, he finds him annoying, why would Hwanwoong ever- ? “Hwanwoong.” He continues, and the younger stops breathing. “You never let me touch you.” 

Hwanwoong blinks, stares at the other and finally breathes again. “I what?”

“You don’t let me touch you.” Youngjo replies slowly, as if explaining the most simple thing to a child. “Like, you get all startled, push me away… The way you reacted the other day made me think that I’d molested you or something-” The older stops himself, laughs uncomfortably and runs a hand down his face. “It’s hard to know if you even like me as a friend when you do that.”

“What?” Hwanwoong repeats, a higher pitch now that he’s managed to make some sense of the situation. But not really. God, he’s too high for this. 

“Hwanwoong-” 

“No. No. Wait- I- Are you saying you… you /like/ me?” 

“I- well yeah.” Youngjo replies, his palms slightly up in a little shrug as if to say ‘This is all I am, all I have to offer. Please take me.’ "I thought that was pretty obvious." 

Hwanwoong feels beyond comprehension, blinking repeatedly as Youngjo just watches him, looking a bit concerned. Perhaps that Hwanwoong may faint. He so might. 

"But- You never told me!" Hwanwoong all but accuses, his heart pounding. 

"I tried to kiss you two days ago and you pushed me-" 

"You try to kiss everybody!" It's stupid. Youngjo can't like him. Not /really/. It doesn't make /sense/-

"On the mouth?" Youngjo arches an eyebrow. And he looks so handsome with the shine of sweat after having ran at night, with the cheap, cold lighting of the hall and everything. Hwanwoong doesn't know why he's mad anymore. "After telling them they look pretty on a balcony? I told you you were the best thing that happened to me this year." 

Okay, now Hwanwoong feels stupid himself. In his defense, alcohol is everywhere this time of the year. Especially if Youngjo is around. 

But perhaps...? Could it possibly be...? 

"But you flirt with everyone." He tries, shyly now, running out of arguments. 

"And you're dense as fuck." 

"Hey!" Hwanwoong complains and weakly attempts to hit him, but Youngjo is too fast- always has been, when it comes to catching him- and grabs his arm, tugging him closer. Hwanwoong can do nothing but stumble forward and look up into those eyes that had him hooked ever since he looked into them for the very first time. He still feels too airheaded to fight... or maybe he just doesn't want to anymore. 

Hwanwoong swallows around the nervous knot in his throat and exhales. "I tried telling you."

Youngjo knits his eyebrows together as if he's trying to recall, searching in the other's face. Hwanwoong feels utterly cherished. 

"A few weeks ago." He elaborates, stepping closer on his own, encouraged by the earnest way Youngjo looks at him, ever so calm and patient. "I was drunk and I called you-"

"Ah." The older chuckles, recognition sparkling in his eyes. "The time you told me 'I love you, you're my best friend'? And you went right into snoring too-" Hwanwoong groans in pure embarrassment and slaps a hand onto Youngjo's infuriatingly pretty mouth. 

"Ugh, stop it." His cheeks are red, unable to hide how ashamed he feels. "God, /fine/ that's on me." Youngjo smiles, Hwanwoong can see it on the pretty curve of his eyes, the way his lips move against his palm and he suddenly feels warm -warmer- and he has to pull away, overwhelmed. 

Youngjo, as expected, doesn't let him go too far, fingers Interlaced as he crowds into Hwanwoong's space again. He reaches up and slides a finger down the younger's red cheek. The older smirks, a devilish like smile that sends a shiver down Hwanwoong's spine. 

"It's fine." Youngjo whispers, their faces so close he can feel the warmth of his breath caressing his skin. "You were so cute, anyways" The older coos, deliberately making fun of Hwanwoong, making him blush an even deeper shade of red. But Hwanwoong feels so relaxed, and he doesn't know whether it's because of the leftover weed in his body or that he finally allowed himself to relax with Youngjo. But he loves it. 

There's a few moments where nothing happens. It's just the two of them, breathing each other's air in the middle of the hallway, too deep inside of their little bubble to care if anyone sees them.

And then Youngjo moves, a fraction of movement that startles Hwanwoong and he stops, eyeing him a bit warily. 

"Are you gonna push me away again?" He whispers, ever so gently. And it's probably their new inside joke, god knows they have way too many of those. But Hwanwoong can hear the insecurity in his voice, can see it in his eyes. And so, he gathers whatever pitiful amount of courage he's got left and firmly shakes his head. 

It's Hwanwoong the one to raise on his tiptoes and press their lips together, the one who hugs the other's neck and presses him closer, clings onto him unabashedly. It's him the one who tugs Youngjo back into his room and kicks the door closed, and the one who ends up whining when he tries to lift Youngjo's shirt and is stopped by the voice of reason: "You smoked, I'm not sober, we really shouldn't." 

Hwanwoong has no choice but threaten to kick Youngjo out if he doesn't /at least/ kiss him some more.The older laughs and complies happily, softly presses him against his bedding and kisses him until Hwanwoong feels drunk with it.

Everything feels so easy, so right, he might burst with love. 

"I was always scared you'd realize how much I liked you." Hwanwoong confesses as they lie side by side, holding their hands up and playing with them gently. 

"Meanwhile I was trying so hard to make you realize." Youngjo chuckles and kisses his cheek, making the younger smile shyly. 

And Hwanwoong can see it now: The way he always comes first for Youngjo, the way the older always finds him in the crowd, always comes close, enough to touch him at least the slightest bit, the way he never misses a chance to pass his arm around Hwanwoong's shoulders, or hold his hand, fix his hair, the collar of his shirts, anything just to touch him a bit longer. 

It makes him feel happy, and safe, knowing that Youngjo will always find the way to him. 

Sometime amidst the sweet little kisses and the soft whispered praises, they fall asleep. 

The next morning Hwanwoong doesn't pull away when Youngjo hugs him from his back as he tries to make edible breakfast. And neither he does later that day, as they hang out with his friends and Youngjo kisses him for everyone to know that, for now, Hwanwoong is his. His to touch, to kiss, to love. Finally.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I honestly adore this ship and there's not nearly enough Oneus fics out there, let alone of these two.  
I hope you like it!


End file.
